The Passing Of A Dog

This kindly friend of mine who’s passed
Beyond the realm of day,
Beyond the realm of darkling night,
To unknown bourne away

Was one who deemed my humble home
A palace grand and fair;
Whose fullest joy it was to find
His comrade ever there.

Ah! He has gone from out my life
Like some dear dream I knew.
A man may own a hundred dogs,
But one he loves, and true.

Anonymous.

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Dealing With A Dead Pet

The Tale Of A Dead Guinea Pig

A recent article by Christy Oglesby of CNN tells of a mother who kept the death of her son’s guinea pig a secret to protect him from the grief while he was studying for exams.

When Christy discovered the stiff corpse of Checkers the guinea pig she found herself in the middle of a moral dilemma that almost turned into an episode of Laurel and Hardy.

Knowing full well that her son Drew would be devastated by the loss of the pet he “loved like a daughter,”  and knowing that he was facing five tests within the next two days, she decided to cover up the death for a couple of days.

The crafty cover-up plot was not without its difficulties. But with a lot of creative distractions and fast talking she managed to maintain the secret for two days until the tests were behind her son.

Of course the inevitable grief still came once the sad news was broken.  But Drew was able to express his grief without affecting his scholastic endeavours. And the reason for the delay in breaking the news to him was fully explained.

Some people would, and did, say that Christy crossed a line.  Are third grade tests more important that a young boys emotional health?  Of course then there is the other camp who agree, that dead guinea pig is a dead guinea pig and a couple of days delay in breaking the news won’t make any difference.

What do you think?  Did the mother act responsibly or did she inhibit her son’s social development?


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Parting With A Pet – silence and tears

When We Two Parted

When we two parted

In silence and tears,

Half broken-hearted,

To sever for years,

Pale grew thy cheek and cold,

Colder thy kiss;

Truly that hour foretold

Sorrow to this!

The dew of the morning

Sunk chill on my brow;

It felt like the warning

Of what I feel now.

The vows are all broken,

And light is thy fame:

I hear thy name spoken

And share in its shame.

They name thee before me,

A knell to mine ear;

A shudder comes o’er me –

Why wert thou so dear?

They know not I knew thee

Who knew thee too well:

Long, long shall I rue thee

Too deeply to tell.

In secret we met:

In silence I grieve

That thy heart could forget,

Thy spirit deceive.

If I should meet thee

After long years,

How should I greet thee?

With silence and tears.

By Lord Byron

 

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The cardinal rule for talking to children about the death of a pet is …

Kim Marie Labak
Information Specialist
University of Illinois
College of Veterinary Medicine

“A pet can be a child’s best friend,” says Cheryl Weber, a client counselor specialist at the University of Illinois Veterinary Teaching Hospital in Urbana. The death of a pet can be a sad and confusing time for children as well as a difficult time for parents. Often parents are dealing with their own grief and aren’t sure how to talk to their children about the death of the pet, whether it’s a hamster, turtle, cat, dog, or horse.

Weber says, “The cardinal rule for talking to children about the death of a pet is: be honest.” She says it’s important to let children say goodbye and to express their grief.

When a pet dies, some parents have the impulse to lie to protect their children from grief. They may tell the child that the pet was given away, lost, or went to a farm to live happily ever after. “Adults may lie because they want to protect their child from sadness and hurt,” explains Weber, a licensed social worker. “It breaks your heart to see a child sob, but it’s normal and healthy for children to grieve. When they love a pet and it dies, they need to know it’s okay to cry.”

Weber suggests sticking to the basic, simple truth, using language the child can understand. If you can foresee a death or euthanasia, you can prepare by talking to the children beforehand, explaining, “Fluffy is very sick and can’t get better.” “When she dies, her heart will stop and she cannot walk or play or eat or purr any more.”

Avoid the euphemism “put to sleep” because it can cause a child to be afraid of going to sleep at night. It’s better to say “Because Fluffy can’t get better, we’re going to help her die.”

Statements like these will probably lead to a barrage of challenging questions such as “Why?” and “Where is she going?” Weber suggests that adults try to answer these questions and help children learn that death is a natural part of life. Many pets have short life spans. They get ill, body parts wear out, they get into accidents, and sometimes they can’t be saved. Plus, parents have the opportunity to discuss their spiritual beliefs with their children.

Other suggestions from Weber include:

ﾷ Let children say goodbye to the pet before euthanasia or burial. A teenager away at college may want to know what’s going on.

ﾷ Let older children or teens be present for the euthanasia, if they want to be, and if they are carefully prepared for what will happen.

ﾷ Some clinics make the family a “clay paw” keepsake (see http://www.claypaws.com). A horse owner may want to keep a clipping of hair from the mane or tail.

ﾷ Let children express their feelings. Encourage a child to draw a picture or write a story about the pet. Making a scrapbook or memory book may help an older child.

ﾷ Let children help in planning a memorial, whether you have ashes, a burial, or a simple eulogy in the living room.

ﾷ Read books together, such as The Tenth Good Thing About Barney, where a mother encourages her son to think of 10 good things about his cat after the cat dies.

ﾷ Parents can learn more about pet loss from resources such as Children and Pet Loss: A Guide for Helping, by Marty Tousley.

ﾷ Don’t rush into getting a new pet.

For more information on talking to children about pet loss, contact your local veterinarian or visit the Companion Animal Related Emotions (CARE) Helpline Web site at http://www.cvm.uiuc.edu/CARE/.

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A Different Grief: Helping You and Your Children

A Different Grief: Helping You and Your Children

The lessons in this 24 lesson course are designed both to help you and your family understand and cope with the grief of losing a beloved family member–your pet. Lessons explain how children of different ages may react to the loss of a beloved family pet, and how they differ from adults in expressing grief. Find useful suggestions to help you talk with children about the sensitive topics of death and euthanasia. Each lesson is delivered to your email inbox on the start date and at the frequency of your choosing. Lessons contain suggested resources such as, online articles, web tools, discussion forum, books and meaningful ways to memorialize your faithful friend.
Learn more now!

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Dealing with the loss of my pet by a 17 Year Old

Dealing with the loss of my pet by a 17 Year Old

Losing a pet is like losing a family member; it is very hard to deal with especially if they have been a part of your life for a long time. There are no real set ways to deal with this loss. Losing your pet it is heart wrenching, sad, depressing and deeply hurtful. It takes a long time to mourn. Everyone needs to find their own way to cope with these feelings.

As a child losing a pet is the hardest thing that they can go through other than losing a close family member or friend. Most have been growing up with their pet and have close bonds. They are true companions, and best friends. They have shared a lot of fun together and made great memories.

I am a 17-year-old boy and I recently lost my dog Tucker who was 20 years old. He had been around my whole life and the thought that he might someday die never really crossed my mind. We shared so many great times together, swimming in the pool, going for rides, playing with his toys and cuddling. He was also my sounding board, he listened but never judged me.

He had been sick for a few months because of the complications of old age. But still doing well enough. He was a fighter and wasn’t ready to leave us. However, one day he became very sick and he couldn’t eat. That went into two days; he looked so sad and sick. We had to put him down it was one of the hardest things I could bare. I stayed in the room with him and so did my brother and father. Our mother was very close to Tucker and she could not stand to be there. All our hearts were breaking.

The way I dealt with the pain was I took a long drive and reflected on the good times that I had with him. After the drive I came home and went up to my room and stared at the ceiling, I just wanted t to be alone and think. A lot of things changed after his passing, it just wasn’t the same, and it never will be.

With the support of my friends and family they helped me to realize that he is in a better place and I will see him when it is my time. Just the other day I thought I saw him lying on my mother’s bed and I went in to pat him. This is going to be a long hard journey, but each day it gets a little easier. And I will always have our memories.

My suggestion for people to help deal with the loss of their pet would be to listen to calming music and reflect on the good times that they had with their pet and think of special moments you shared together. Another way could be to get a new pet. Some people feel that they need to fill the void left and it gives them something else to start loving and take their mind off of their beloved pet. For me that was not an option. Another good way is to find a close friend or a relative that you have known for a while and just talk to them because they will be there to comfort you. And they can share in your stories and memories. Creating a memorial is another way to help remember your pet.

http://www.mypet-memorial.net

Articles Source – Free Articles
About the Author

N Dawkins is the author.

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Loss of a dog.

A Labrador Retriever can generally live for up to 13 years or a few years longer as long as good medical care exists. Most of us consider our pets as friends, as loyal companions who are always there to share our happiness and laughters or be with us in our darkest hour, listening and understanding us in their own little way. With the innocence and playfulness reflected in their eyes, some pets are considered as a child, a playmate or a sibling.

The death of a pet can affect us like or even more than the death of a relative or friend. Some may not share your grief of losing a dear friend and some may not even understand your grieving for losing just a pet. But you must realize that you do not need anyone’s approval to mourn the loss of your pet, nor you do not have to explain yourself to anyone. You and your pet spent countless days and nights together in each other’s company making your bond so strong. It is just normal to express grief when he’s already gone.

The first thing that you should do is to talk about your feelings. Talk to people who will understand you. If your family or friends love pets, they will understand what you are going through. You can seek help from pet bereavement counseling services, pet-loss support hotlines, local or online bereavement groups, books, videos and magazine articles. Talk about your feelings! Don’t try to avoid your grief by not thinking or trying not to think about your pet. Look at his photos, reminisce the good times, and talk to others about your loss. Express your feelings, write it in a journal or a poem or a blog.

If there are children in the home, be careful and be honest in telling them the real situation. Make sure that they can handle the information about death and the loss of the pet. Never say that the pet was “put to sleep” or “went away” because your child may wait for the pet’s return. Make it clear to your child that the pet will not return but he is happy wherever he is now. Just like you, it is normal for the child to grieve over the lost pet.

A Labrador Retriever can truly provide years of companionship and love but his death doesn’t mean the end of everything, that you will also live in grief and pain. Remember, your pet doesn’t want to see you sad…

By: Richard Cussons

Richard Cussons writes information articles on different breed of dog such as Labrador Retriever. Check out Labrador dog training tips at labradorsavvy.com.

Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com

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Is Pet Cremation the Right Option for You?

Because our pets are members of our families, pet loss is a tragic event. Many pet owners find themselves unprepared when their pet ages or becomes ill. If you are in one of these situations, or if you’ve recently suffered the sudden loss of your pet, you may be wondering if pet cremation is the right option for you. Allow me to answer several frequently asked questions regarding pet cremation so you can make a confident choice in the matter.

Why Should I Choose Pet Cremation?

When your pet is cremated, his/her remains are returned so that you may place them in a pet urn. This allows you the ability of keeping your pet close should you and your family relocate. It also offers the flexibility of burying some ashes or scattering some ashes in your yard or your pet’s favorite place while keeping the rest in a pet urn.

Is Cremation Just for Small Pets?

No. Cremation is available for pets of every size, from birds to horses.

How Do I Locate A Pet Crematory?

Your veterinarian can usually recommend a crematory or you may find one in your local telephone directory.

What Does the Process of Pet Cremation Involve?

Cremation is performed using a special furnace called a cremation chamber. The process requires extreme heat (usually 1500 – 1600 degrees Fahrenheit) along with evaporation in the chamber to reduce the body to its basic elements, which are referred to as cremated remains or cremains. Also commonly called ashes, the cremains are in fact bone fragments, which are reduced further in size until they resemble a sand-like substance.

Are There Different Types of Cremation?

Yes, and because there are different types, you’ll want to confirm your preference with your vet or crematory. You’ll need to consider which one of the following methods best aligns with your wishes

Private Cremation – A pet is placed in the chamber alone, with no other pets. Upon completion of the cremation, the pet’s cremains are removed from the chamber, processed and returned to the owners for transferring to the pet urn of their choice.

Viewing Cremation – The owner, family and/or friends are permitted to be present in a viewing room during the cremation. This option is not available at all crematories so you’ll want to confirm availability prior to making arrangements if this is your preferred method.

Individual Cremation – Pets share space in the cremation chamber with other pets. Each pet is separated from the others in the chamber so that their cremains can be returned to the proper owners.

Communal (Mass) Cremation – Multiple pets are cremated together. This option does not allow for separate cremains. The pets’ ashes are not returned to the owner. It is common practice for these cremains to be disposed of commercially.

How Can I Be Sure I’ll Get My Pet’s Cremains?

Your veterinarian can supply the contact information for crematories he/she has a relationship with. Using a reputable crematory can assure you and your pet are both treated with respect.

How Do I Transfer the Ashes To A Permanent Pet Urn?

Your pet’s cremains will usually arrive in a temporary urn sealed in a plastic bag. The ashes are bagged to prevent accidental loss should the pet urn be dropped or damaged. The bag also helps to prevent damage from moisture. It is preferable to transfer the entire plastic bag of cremains into the permanent pet urn.

If you find it uncomfortable to place the ashes into the permanent urn, family members, friends, or your veterinarian can likely provide the support you need by helping to complete the transfer for you. Most permanent pet urns are not complicated to open having a simple panel with just a few screws.

While pet loss is always a difficult experience, knowing your pet will remain close to you can be enormously reassuring. By understanding the various aspects of pet cremation, you will be prepared to make a choice that will bring you comfort and peace.

Articles Source – Free Articles
About the Author

Mark Greer is President of Angel Ashes, offering unique pet urns that provide a lasting tribute for your cherished friend. If you’re considering pet cremation, visit us at http://www.angelashes.com. Our selection includes tasteful wood urns, our signature angel urns and others.

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Children experience pet loss differently

Are you Facing Pet Loss?
Explore both the myths and the realities surrounding the experience of pet loss, including why it
hurts so much and how it differs from other losses in this
Self-Healing Expressions email course.

• Learn how children of different ages react to the loss of a beloved family pet, and how
  they differ from adults in expressing grief.
• Find useful suggestions to help you talk with children about the sensitive topics of death and
  euthanasia.
• Be guided through the emotional upheaval of grief and come to a better understanding of
  the shock, disbelief, anger, guilt and sorrow that are commonly experienced when a beloved pet
  is lost.
• Discover how to plan ahead for the death of a pet while honoring your own values and
  spiritual beliefs, and find suggestions for meaningful ways to memorialize your faithful
  friend.
• Learn also what you can do when a pet has gone missing, how you can provide for your pet
  in case of your own unexpected absence or death, and how to support a friend who has lost a pet.

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